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Thread: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

  1. #1
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    Default Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Hello everyone... Im 16 years old with a 60 degree kyphosis. I found out about it (when i started being awake) 6 months ago. Since then my life has been nothing but shit and self battles, I feel like i can't take that anymore. I want to have a surgery for none of the doctors want to do it because it's not the degree to operate. I am trying everything, excercises, therpay, but none of this work. I cant fucking even wear a normal t shirt because my curve is too big and i dont want people to see it. No matter how hard i am trying to convince my parents to do it they just saying NO and doesn't give even one shit about it!!! I am sick of this life and i feel like i can't take it anymore. Why from all the things in the world i got this? Why me?? I dont know what to do anymore and have tears in my eyes writing this
    Last edited by GillyG; 27th April 2014 at 06:09 PM. Reason: unacceptable swear word

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Ahi, I am a mom of a child with scoliosis, and maybe not who you want to hear from right now, but my daughter too has this condition, and I would hate to see rods in her back for the rest of her life. They can be faulty, cause more pain, etc., Are you in pain? Have you heard of Airrosti? Are you in the US?

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Hi Ahi

    I'm so sorry to hear how your kyphosis is making you feel Unfortunately, the psychological effects of having scoliosis/kyphosis are (in my opinion) hugely underrated. I hope you can access some sort of help to help you work through your issues.

    P.S. I edited out a small section of your original post because of the bad language used. Whilst we appreciate how you feel, we have many young members on this site and we want to keep it somewhere parents will be happy for their youngsters to come and read posts.
    Me, a Mod? Nah ... I'll always be a rocker

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Quote Originally Posted by Momhelp View Post
    Ahi, I am a mom of a child with scoliosis, and maybe not who you want to hear from right now, but my daughter too has this condition, and I would hate to see rods in her back for the rest of her life. They can be faulty, cause more pain, etc., Are you in pain? Have you heard of Airrosti? Are you in the US?
    Yes i also have pain. And Im not from the US, Israel...

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Ahi; I have a friend who is also from Israel, who lives in the states. She went to TelAviv for Shroth Method excersizes for her daughter, who is currently braced in the US - and has not gone through surgery. This method helped with the pain/curve. If this is something you'd like to try - I'd be happy to get in touch with her and PM you the details. Something I can tell you as a parent - I would take all of my daughters pain and misery away, if I could take this from her and bear it on my own for the rest of my life. How you feel about your parents and the situation right now is absolutely OK. But please remember they too are hurting for you...so as I tell my own daugthter...dont be mean to me, as I love you more than life. You WILL get through this - and if you want this contact number, I'll find it for you...

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Quote Originally Posted by Momhelp View Post
    Ahi; I have a friend who is also from Israel, who lives in the states. She went to TelAviv for Shroth Method excersizes for her daughter, who is currently braced in the US - and has not gone through surgery. This method helped with the pain/curve. If this is something you'd like to try - I'd be happy to get in touch with her and PM you the details. Something I can tell you as a parent - I would take all of my daughters pain and misery away, if I could take this from her and bear it on my own for the rest of my life. How you feel about your parents and the situation right now is absolutely OK. But please remember they too are hurting for you...so as I tell my own daugthter...dont be mean to me, as I love you more than life. You WILL get through this - and if you want this contact number, I'll find it for you...
    Unfortunalty, I will not get through this. I have the most un supportive parents in the world who doesn't give a f about me and i also found out i have lordosis. My best chance to end this is to stick a bullet in my head when i get to the army

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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    I'm sorry you are in such turmoil, but you WILL get through it. You're stronger than you think. We have a member here who made a huge cosmetic improvement to his kyphosis by lifting weights - he ended up looking really buff! Why not try this? You'll need to be strong to be accepted into the army anyway.
    37 years old, diagnosed with infantile idiopathic scoliosis at 6 months old with curves of 62(T) and 40(L) degrees. Casting and Milwaukee braces until surgery at 10 - ant release/pos fusion T1-T12, halo traction. Post op cast and then TLSO. Further surgery at 18 (ant release/pos fusion extended to L3 to include lumbar curve, costoplasty) and 25 (another costoplasty). Fusion extended to L4 at 33 (XLIF with 4 pedicle screws and two short rods). Pre-op curves: 76(T) and 70(L). Post-op curves: 45(T) and 35(L). Diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome aged 34; scoliosis almost certainly due to this rather than being idiopathic.

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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    At my country, army is mandtory. I want to be in a specail unit and do something with my life and not sit at the chair all day doing nothing like 12 years of school. But unfortunatly, my back ruins the entering for it.

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    Red face Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Ahi,

    Can we help you find someone in TelAviv who might be able to help you?

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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Quote Originally Posted by AhiGibor View Post
    At my country, army is mandtory. I want to be in a specail unit and do something with my life and not sit at the chair all day doing nothing like 12 years of school. But unfortunatly, my back ruins the entering for it.
    Why would your back stop you from joining the army, a number of members with some severe kyphosis curves have been, or are currently serving in the military, one member even had his surgery whilst still serving
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  11. #11
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Stay strong hope you get better

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Hello friend, I can see your hate in your text and i can feel exactly what are you trying to say. I m 24 and have an 80 degree sheurmann kyphosis . I live in a tropical island which you need to go to the beach every summer and every time I go there people stare at me like i donít belong in this world. Itís something new to them. I have try exercises and therapy and the brace when i was younger. I got better and for a few years but now Iím in the worst phase of my life because I donít expect my body as it is(and i never will) . I feel I just donít have the strength to get back from it anymore. All my life I had this thoughts ďwhy meĒ and ďwhy I can be normalĒ. I visit the doctor today because i get dizzy and I believe it comes from my back because of the nerves. He mention about surgery... I had the chance to do when I was your age and then I consider it again when I was 19 but I reject it. I gave a chance to exercise my body from a guy which change my life back then. I got improve from 80 degrees to 60 degrees and I got relief from pain. But now I have to workout for almost 3 years and thing they just getting worse and ugly. It just drain myself every time because of that. The only thing that keeps me going is football. I have been playing since a kid and Iím still doing it now .A surgery will probably make me never play football again. My answer to the doctor's question today was NO even though deep down I want that surgery as bad as anything else. Reading your post today makes me realize some thing. Life is full of small joys. 3 years i go i was feeling very good because of the thing I achieve. I will give you one advice... try you best to fix thing up in your life. Donít just let it flow. I know it is very hard....I did make a change( and believe me it was not easy as it sounds) and I will start work out again. Remove the negativity from you and try to take the best out of you.Be the best you can be but travel hopefully with a large dose o reality. If you read this post you will understand that a few years back I have found a light in my life...what does it stop you.
    PS sorry about my English..

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Hi to my young Israeli friend,
    Sorry I did not see your post earlier, but I hope you are still checking this forum. Your situation is not without hope. I am informed that Israel has high standards of health services, top-quality medical resources and research, modern hospital facilities, and an impressive ratio of physicians and specialists to population. Health care for all, from infancy to old age, is ensured by law and the national expenditure on health compares favorably with that of other developed countries. There are specialists in Israel that can help you physically, mentally and emotionally. There are 72 Orthopedic specialists at the Herzliya Medical Center according to my quick internet search. I would hope that your parents would seek out these specialists. If they are unable or unwilling to do so (as you seem to indicate), you need to take charge and seek out these specialists as soon as you are emancipated. Please consider talking to your friends, relatives, religious leaders, and anyone else that might be able to provide support and guidance. Finally, I would ask one favor from you. People reading your initial post really need to see that you have done something constructive to change your direction. Everyone who turns to this forum is looking for hope in one form or another. Please share with us something positive. Something to show others that it is possible to change your life for the better. If this is too much to ask now, then I respectfully ask that you share when you are able.
    Best to you, Steve

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Sorry to hear about your situation. It's psychologically tearing not being able to fit in due to a condition out of your control, even in the simplest way of wearing what you want. It's interesting that you became aware of your body so young. I didn't realize how different my body was from others until a couple of years ago - I'm slow to learn apparently. Ever since, aside from going to work, I avoid leaving my home and imposing my body on the public for dissection. You're not alone. I hope things look up for you.

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Im sick of this life.. It will never change

    Quote Originally Posted by anonymous24 View Post
    Hello friend, I can see your hate in your text and i can feel exactly what are you trying to say. I m 24 and have an 80 degree sheurmann kyphosis . I live in a tropical island which you need to go to the beach every summer and every time I go there people stare at me like i donít belong in this world. Itís something new to them. I have try exercises and therapy and the brace when i was younger. I got better and for a few years but now Iím in the worst phase of my life because I donít expect my body as it is(and i never will) . I feel I just donít have the strength to get back from it anymore. All my life I had this thoughts ďwhy meĒ and ďwhy I can be normalĒ. I visit the doctor today because i get dizzy and I believe it comes from my back because of the nerves. He mention about surgery... I had the chance to do when I was your age and then I consider it again when I was 19 but I reject it. I gave a chance to exercise my body from a guy which change my life back then. I got improve from 80 degrees to 60 degrees and I got relief from pain. But now I have to workout for almost 3 years and thing they just getting worse and ugly. It just drain myself every time because of that. The only thing that keeps me going is football. I have been playing since a kid and Iím still doing it now .A surgery will probably make me never play football again. My answer to the doctor's question today was NO even though deep down I want that surgery as bad as anything else. Reading your post today makes me realize some thing. Life is full of small joys. 3 years i go i was feeling very good because of the thing I achieve. I will give you one advice... try you best to fix thing up in your life. Donít just let it flow. I know it is very hard....I did make a change( and believe me it was not easy as it sounds) and I will start work out again. Remove the negativity from you and try to take the best out of you.Be the best you can be but travel hopefully with a large dose o reality. If you read this post you will understand that a few years back I have found a light in my life...what does it stop you.
    PS sorry about my English..

    May I ask which exercises contributed to those improvements?

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