View Full Version : Tricky Question

20th September 2007, 08:32 AM
Hi Everyone,
Last night, Cerys said her back hurt so I gave it a rub (nightly ritual now!) when she asked me what she had done to her back. Bearing in mind that she is not 4 til Jan I tried to keep it simple and told her that when she was a baby in my tummy her bones didn't grow properly and that her back was curly at the top instead of straight. She seemed to accept this and we then had to go through a list of what bones she has in her body!
It's the first time she has questioned it so I hope that I said the right thing!! I'm going to tell playgroup this morning in case she asks them.
On a side note, she has the SENCO worker going into playgroup next week to see her so we will see what she has to say! I don't know what they can do and I'm assuming it is more to do with her hearing loss!

20th September 2007, 09:37 AM
i think that was a fantastic explanation for a curious 4 year old, who is obviously as bright as a button! :D

Gilly xx

20th September 2007, 10:59 AM
For some odd reason I can actually being a pre-schooler (so aged under 5) and asking my mother this......we were standing in the bathroom at home at the time. I asked her why I had to wear the plaster cast, and she sort of bent herself to one side to show what my spine was doing It wasn't a great explanation but I can remember just going "oh ok" and accepting that.

Your explanation was much better! Cerys sounds like a really bright little thing - a potential orthopaedic surgeon maybe? :D

20th September 2007, 06:46 PM
Every once in a while Deirdre goes through the "why me" routine and although I try not to minimize her concerns, I tell her that no one is perfect and although God gave her bad back genes he compensated in other ways by giving her the face of an angel and that she's a wonderful friend to those around her. Dealing for so long with this medical issue has made her wiser beyond her years.

Amazed Jean
20th September 2007, 07:27 PM
Ella and Sealy,Ah, the curiousity of children. It just seems like we should have the right answers for them. Congratulations! Good job! Both kids benefit greatly from having an informed, gentle Moms.

20th September 2007, 07:50 PM
Sealy, you're so right... Deirdre was given the face of an angel. That's a wonderful response to her "why me"s. And Ella, that is the perfect level of detail for your daughter's age.

I don't remember asking questions when I was little, though I'm sure I must have. I really don't remember a time when I didn't know what was wrong with my back. I grew up looking at comparisons between my successive xrays and listening to the doctors discussing my case with my parents. I had a pretty good understanding of my problems before I got to preschool (age 3).

20th September 2007, 07:53 PM
Hi Ella

Sounds to me like your explanation was great. I had this a while ago now as I wanted Erin to be comfortable explaining to other children why she wore a cast. It's a hard one isn't it? We haven't had the "why me" conversation or question though - I guess that one's to come.

I am currently going through the "how do babies get into tummies" and "how do they come out" questions. No idea how to get over those. I think 5 is a little young for those conversations. :D

So Cerys is going to be a surgeon! Erin wants to work with brains...and when pushed she said dead ones. Lovely!

Hope the visit goes well

20th September 2007, 08:50 PM
I think those are fantastic explanations, you are superb parents!!!!!

20th September 2007, 10:27 PM
Awww...Kimberly it sounds so sweet when you say it :squeeze:

Andrea, we haven't had the birds and bees discussion yet but I have a feeling her older brother has already spilled the beans on that one since this was part of his curriculum in school last year. He knows all about the fallopian tubes and the womb etc. etc... :oops: He also managed to tell her a couple of years ago that there is no such thing as Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy and many of her peers still believe in such childhood fairy tales. Oh the curse of older brothers! :soapbox:

21st September 2007, 05:18 PM
That was mean of him. Still, if he has the difficult discussions with her as well, then perhaps you can forgive him. Erin still believes in Santa and tooth fairies, although is starting to ask questions that I can't answer (like where does she put all the teeth). I'm just not imaginative enough.

Perhaps you can hire him out to do the B&B discussion with other young children :D

Amazed Jean
21st September 2007, 08:22 PM
What do you mean the Santa story? Tooth fairy too? Next you'll be telling me there is no Peter Pan, Easter Bunny.

21st September 2007, 08:22 PM
Hi all
I'm glad we're not having the birds and bees yet although I think Brooke (9) is getting suspicious about santa and tooth fairy!!
Cerys hasn't asked anymore so I'm assuming that she is satisfied with the answer I gave her.
I must admit that there were tears in my eyes as she asked what she had done to her back - bless her
I'm sure the kids handle this better than their mums and Dads!!
Love to you all
Ella xx